sciientology is the opium of the stupid...

London is on the verge of needing a vigilante, you can tell a city is in that phase of its city life-cycle when lawyers are getting killed, and it's never the bad lawyers, its katie holmes lawyers who are sexy and try to fight for justice but need a guy wearing a halloween costume because their lame and married a scientologist.

Niice Rock Boobies...

Rock boobies, i love them gooood. There should be a song about them, something that is in a musically sense roughly between the B-52's 'Rock Lobster', Pink Floyds 'Comfortably Numb', Jeff Buckley's 'Forget Her' and Ween's 'Push the lil Daisies'. It could be called 'Forget Pushing the Rock Boobies there is an Alarm!' and it would be sung in duet between JFK and Lee Harvey Oswald with Evil Knieval doing back up vocals. It would be a great hit until Kanye West tries to remix it to the Smurfs theme tune while grunting about his mum through his teeth bling. Hopefully teeth bling will enact the genetic darwin clause of all rap singers and they will either evolve some brains or eat each other.
And yes that is the real Venus de Milo in the Louvre museum Paris. I was not arrested.

The Liitle corpses cuddle...

The plague takes the people

the people become the bones

the bones become the dust

the dust becomes the fields

the fields become the crops

the crops become the people.

second verse same as the first, little bit louder, little bit worse...

Hugses iis goodses...

Everyone loves hugs.

In France not loving hugs is bad, this is a sign indicating a random hugging area. in this case it is advisable to walk around with your arms out and know that strangers will hug you because your doing that.

Another reason i'm not going back to Frenchtown.

Also be advised that in england this sign depicts an area of frequent goal scoring.

Briitish museummmm...

the British Museum 0wnzorz, its like a giant pub made of marble and with big stairs. plus you can get hammered just walking around looking at really old stuff like dead egyptian guys. its probably only a matter of time before promo girls start going there.
WHAM!
Your museum experience just got betterer.

Driive at your own risk...

How does a revered car company like BMW, who has made bond cars actually come up with something that looks all to similar to the "IT" that Mr Garrison invented, its a cause for shame. National shame. Anybody who buys one of these things and expects to be taken seriously is probably insane and/or a bull-dyke. I took this photo in France, where else.

Rocks and Tiities...

I like rocks, female nudity and the corrs aren't a bad band, which is why this statue appealed to me. there should definatley be more statues in the world, in general statues are harmless. This statue howver is hiding a dark secret, the violin is actually a WMD, note she doesnt actually have bow to play it, also the tip of the violin, while not pictured here is actually aimed directly at the base of the Eiffel tower.

Cheap old dusty wiine...

No mobiles, No Wigwams, No walkmans, None of that, none of the other, and you definatley shouldn't abuse the food trays in the playground. Just like Jason Statham realized you just can't go around breaking rules like this willy nilly and not expect to wind up jumping off trucks and having your house blown up.

Bradbury for Presiident...

It's a damn shame, I wouldn't have missed my train to Paris if it had'nt been for all these slow people on the platform, you know the ones what roll down ramps. I was subtly hoping they'd fall over, then i could have done a Bradbury but it wasn't to be. Steven Bradbury should be australian of the the year for the next 10 years and also for the last 10 retrospectivley