piirates are way cool...

as stated in the last post global warming is directly influenced by the number of pirates, so to save the world from global warming i am doing my part and announcing myself as a pirate.
also there is some deabte in the wider community over which is better, pirates or ninjas. let me say now that there are 2 parts to this argument:
1. who would win in a fight between a pirate and a ninja.
2. who has the most fun.
comment with your answers, myself i believe a ninja would win the fight only if the pirate didnt take him out drinking the night before, and of course pirates have more fun. garrr!

only 30 piirates left...

this is a graph clearly showing that the dwindling number of pirates is causing global warming, i recommend you check it out for yourself at www.venganza.org there is also a link now on the sidebar to the homepage of the church of the almighty flying spaghetti monster.
and remember,
WWFSMD?

treasures plentii!

this here be a treasure map hearties, x means treasure and i've drawn so many onto this image that one of them has to be right, also i drew where there will be some fish. sure you can have a crack at it yourself but which area is the proterozoic rocks that have supergened alluvial deposits, is it pink areas, i dont know! do you feel lucky, punk?
of course it'll be easier just do go fishing, and swimming, who's up for that?

you cannot handiil the truth

i was once a werewolf, this was in the time before my gun-running days and after my involvement in the 20day mongolian conflict with libya. i cured it with the help of a rare flower known only as the 'albino-spider-orchid' to stop myself from reverting to werewolf form i need to collect one of these flowers and eat it every other year, so i'm heading on a roadtrip down to the coast where it's found, Bremer-town. who's coming with me?

dalek chiicken

this is the mighty dalek chicken, the dalek chicken derives its super powers from not eating asparagus ever, not even on turkish bread. dalek chicken is evil, he is paranoid evil and is always wary of the mighty snooze button, the snooze button spells doom for the dalek chicken, if dalek chicken ever learnt to read it would then spell snooze but for now snooze is doom, doom on you!
this is a picture of dalek chicken using his powers of flight.
we pray dalek chicken does not visit tonight,
as in the bible:
"you shall know the dalek chicken and the dalek chicken shall set you free" John 8:32

iindegestible...

yesterday i took this photo, its a rock on the top of pelham hill near a town called toodyay, this rock is one of the few i did not attempt to eat that day. its probably laterite, yay for that eh. i wanted to eat one of the smaller round ones but they arent for eating,.... apparently.

20 thiings to do...

like darkness itself they come from the east...
a conger egation like this happens only sparsley across the millenia, and this friday there will be a conjunction of forces, beginning at the paddo and moving swiftly through the night, pray, pray that it does not end like last time...
until friday though i have a shite-load of work to get through, this is a picture of some of it, in reality it is a far greater thing of monstrous proportions that only with the snicker-snack of a vorpal blade will it be slain.
bring on frabjous friday!

hiigh voltage...

Today i was walking along and noticed this sign, it reads 'Danger 132,000 Volts'. i have a few problems with this, firstly i dont think its wise to go around telling terrorists where we keep our volts, and in what quantities, also it isn't wise to let me know this. at this moment i am googling like a mad pidgeon scientist trying to find a way to utilize these volts so carelessly left about, maybe for time travel i'm not sure. to get through the wire i will use dynamite, wirecutters are made of metal and my yr 10 physics knowledge says no.

machiine of death...

this is a photo of the coffee machine at work, i am employed as the worst waiter in the world. the machine is called the M30 Dosatron, the name freaks me out, anything called an M30 Dosatron probably has some sort of reactor inside it with a core that will eventually fail and/or overload. it also sounds sinister, like the guy who originally invented it wasnt happy with the job he got after defecting from soviet russia. "those bastards want capitalist coffee huh? in soviet russia coffee drinks YOU!".
yeah, so i'm still not allowed to make coffee at work.

dude check out my piipe...

On the labyrinthian path to the comodes in the enclave known as nu-vibe are these quite large pipes leading from the basement levels through the roof, one pipe is for refuelling the alien ships the other is for returning their payload of hu-man blood to feed the basement vampires and machine elves.

last night ii was abducted...

Last night I was abducted. This is a completley true and factitious event. It happened sometime after we had finished drinkies at the scotsman, we had kicked on to a place called nu-vibe and it was here in a midst of lasers and music that i was abducted. i remember it well, David Bowie's 'Magic Dance' was playing the lasers where in full swing and the smoke machine had just gone off obscuring all around, when from the mist a figure came and swept me up. after this it is blurry and the abductor has not left any visible marks on my body for proof, they'll be back though, i'll be ready. This photo is one i handed to the feds as an accurate picture of the crime scene.

flyiing scotsmen...

Tonight is scotsman night, the flying scotsman is a very nice pub that has student priced beer $8 jugs every wednesday is scotsman night! afterwards there is a place called connies where you can go to see lesbian mud wrestling, this place distracts the lesbians and femminists from trying to invade the flying scotsman and renaming it the sensible shoes scotsperson or the raging dyke. this photo was taken towards the end of a scotsman night.

clandestiine cupcake operations...

Cupcake fairies must be knowled gable of all the elements of clandestine operations, Mirry.S here is demonst rating ID deterrent goggles that are used to go to incognito places. as i've said before being a cupcake fairy means making and delivery baked goods to unsuspecting peoples, half the fun is doing this in an undetected way. so if you get the urge to become a cupcake fairy remember: dont get caught!

men iinvented teh civilizations...

It is a universal truth, men invented civilization. they did this in the time between the end of the last ice age and the invention of the modern frigidaire or refrigratore, during this time in most parts of the world beer was not able to be kept cold, thus with no other avenue for escaping the constant nagging of women they created politics to keep themselves occupied, with the advent of cold beer once more you will find every parliament in the world now has a beer garden. this picture was taken as an effect of going to a beer garden.

don't kiill the leprechauns...

its true, you proabably shouldn't. although they are small and if underfoot this could happen to you, in that case your best bet is to turn them into a puppet, weekend at bernies style. this is to try to avoid the wrath of the other little people long enough to come up with a better plan. i once kicked my cousins chihuahua across the room because i failed the 'watch-where-you-walk' test, but then again so did the dog i guess.

fiight not on holy ground...

I was walking past this church today and made myself remember where it was, just in case you know. it seems the vampires and chosen and such cannot fight on holy ground, also even though he wants too christopher lambert isn't even allowed so its a good idea to always know where your nearest holy place is. this church seemed big enough to do the job. it was made of tiny bricks, seriously the bricks where way smaller than the ones used in my house, like the architecht wanted to make way too much work for the builders.

10 iinches too serious...

Still confused over the hotel awakenings i followed the zen of the hotel layout which after several increasingly more sinister dead ends to0k me to the elevators, this possibly being a mistake i headed to the lobby, when i got there a crowd had gathered and pretty soon i was sitting in a conference, the had jugs of water and glasses in front of everybody, along with notepads and pens with the hotels name on them, i listened to the speeches and made notes. this photo i took to try to emphasize my surprise at it all. the guy behind me is about 10 inches too serious.

hotel awakeniings...

This morning I woke up in a hotel, I had a feeling this might happen as i vaguely remembered going to sleep in or around one, but it was still a surprise, its always weird to wake up in a strange place, especial when there has been drinkies involved. nobody else was around so i went on the balcony to scout out an exit, the pool looked like it was possible to dive into from whatever level i was on, but i ended up realising that the door was not locked and i was not yet in a hostage situation. this photo was taken from the balcony, and i never did discover the mortal entrance to the watery place.

K.billy, unlost iin the grand scheme of things...

I found K.billy in the garage, it looked fearsome and mischefos, i think it died of boredom because the garage is quite sensationally sterile. i never knew he lived there until today, i will miss him he lived on the edge, you can tell he had a good life because of his build, he was muscly but not without agilty, K.billy's almost agile spirit still lives in my garage, and in times of need i will consult his small wisdom, you were a good bug K.billy, i'll see you soon enough.

liittle hatshop of death...

I discovered a hat shop last week, this hat was my favourite, it made me feel like asking people for tickets, since the group i was with had caught the train this became annoying for them.
if there were more hat shops in the world it'd be a better place, bowler hats should totally come back in.
we can make it happen peoples.

Real Biier...

I ran an event once and the day before all the drinkies were dropped off to my place, this is a photo of smoe of it forming a wall in my garage, K.Billy guarded it that night, i think if i ever get the chance i would line every room in the house with a wallof alchohol, its protection from radiation, and should any isotopes become lodged in my liver instead of iodine i can flush them with hair of the dog. this photo gives me warm feelings.